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Y Friday, September 28, 2007

i'm a naughty gal todae.. din go to sch.. hehehe.. had a tiff wif andy.. feel rather bad act.. to make dee miss his lesson.. i reali do feel bad ok! i'm not such a meanie.. onli temper is super bad.. hehehe.. forgive me ok.. i'm stil a lil gal.. hahahaha..

anw aft we left sch.. me n dee headed to vivo city.. wanted to catch a show but all the shops were stil closed, includin the cinema.. so we went up to e rooftop to soak our legs in the icy cold water.. n we made footprints on e wooden floor..

footprints wif DEe's shoe in sight.. haha..
and i also took a pretty pic of myself.. nice? wahaha.. ok looks kinda stupid actually..
aft soakin our leggys.. we went to e arcade.. played a while den went down to e cinema.. luckily it has alr opened.. we stared at e screen for super long time.. not knowing which show to watch.. n guess wad happened next?? tis guy n lady approached us n ask if we could let dem take a few pics of us for gv's membership card.. i tot so myself 'y not rite? it would b fun!' so we agreed.. dee had to hold popcorn n a drink while i held two membership card of gv.. it was super small la.. n e shape of popcorn.. den e photographer came n took a couple of pics of us.. we took in front of the light box, in front of tis huge poster of popcorn n lastly we pose at e food counter.. it was quite fun actually.. but tink my smile was kinda fake.. n i look horrible la.. i had v lil makeup on todae.. n wore super slack la.. hope e pics turn out nice.. n hope i look fab! hehe.. so all of u readin my blog pls rmb to look out for me n dee in sun's straits times lifestyle! =D

10:02 pm

Y Thursday, September 27, 2007

getting back tgt with andy i'm not sure if i'l be happy or not.. i duno if i'l be able to experience the sweet feeling of being in love.. mayb i would.. mayb i won.. prob he would jus treat me e SAME old way again.. wadeva it is.. i chose tis path n i hv to bear the consequences.. be it good or bad.. as long as he doesnt do anting wrong to hurt our rls den its fine..

i feel lik a stranger in his house now.. there's nth which belongs to me here.. no trace of me.. it no longer has the warmth feeling.. i can no longer call this my second home.. our picture.. my clothes.. my nail polish are all gone from his hse.. back into my own home.. i used to be happy coming to his house.. happy being able to talk to his bro or dad who always talks alot.. but at least they make me feel lik we're one family, they accept me.. except his mom la.. smtimes she seems ok.. whn she ask me to take dinner.. cut fruits n offer me sm.. but whn she saes stupid stuff or treats andy badly i seriously jus wanna slap her f* face.. she don lik me don wanna talk much to me its ok la.. i can accept.. but i cant accept the fact tat she act encouraged her son to go out wif another gals! wth.. wad kinda stupid mom is taT? i made a mistake.. yes.. i admit its my fault n i'm guily n sorry abt it.. but as his mom i believe she should be teachin her son the RIGHT stuff.. n not ask him to do wrong.. thru tis can act they she is e revengeful type.. wad ppl do to her she'l do e same ting back.. haha.. wad a fucked up mom.. sorry to sae tis.. but she's seriously FUCKED up!

5:23 pm

Y Monday, September 24, 2007

i'm sorry things had to end tis way..
i noe i've hurt u n i won deny its my fault..
i made many mistakes in tis rls..
i ruin our rls time n again..

i'l miss ur silly smile..
i'l miss ur cutie face..
i'l miss ur cute dimple..
i'l miss e silly stuff u do..
i'l miss giving u a massage aft ur gym..
i'l miss seeing ur mascular arms..
i'l miss ur hugs, ur kisses, ur everything..
i'l miss peggy..
i'l miss hanging out in ur house..
i'l miss lotsa stuff..
n most importantly,

i try hard to hold back my tears..
but when e harsh reality sets in..
my tears just cant stop flowing..

u may not be the best..
u may not be able to give me everything..
but one thing is for sure..
u're my everything..
and I LOVE U..

whereever u r..
whatever u do..
i wish u all e best..
n hope tat u'l be able to find ur one true love..
work hard for ur studies..
prove to ur mom u r capable of good results..
and her money did not go to waste..

i don dare to sms u neither do i dare to cal u for fear tat u would not wanna hear my voice or c my msg.. so i shall give u my blessings here.. take care..

10:21 pm

Y Friday, September 21, 2007

when dad din wanna talk to me i was unhappy.. now tat he is talkin to me again n finally accepted e fact tat i'm attached.. i tot i shld be happy.. but i'm not.. i tot being in a rls onli involves 2 ppl.. yet now it not onli involves me n my bf.. my parents n his parents r also involved.. when i quarrel wif my bf, my dad has to comment on it.. my bf cal me he will make noise.. he jus keeps nagging n nagging.. it gets me so frustrated n it stresses me out tryin to lessen his comments on my rls..

not onli do i have to bother abt wad my parents say.. i also hv to build a gd rls with his parents n try my best to communicate with them, leave them a gd impression of me.. his dad is ok.. its easy having a convo with him.. its his mom tat is e hard part.. y mus tings b so diff? i tot e rls onli involves me n andy yet now 6 ppl r in it.. or mayb even 7 including his bro..

i have to do my best in buildin up e rls with his parents yet my bf isnt doin aniting to let my parents get to know him better.. each time he has to meet my parents or any of my family member he'l jus try to avoid it.. n give e excuse of them not liking him or tat dey've a bad impression of him.. if he at least put in a bit of effort n show my parents wad kinda person he act is den tings prob won b so diff for me.. at least my parents noe i'm in gd hands.. dey nd not worry.. i noe my dad is strict n seems fierce n it may b bit diff.. but if he's willing to take e first step n let dem noe him better i believe they wld also come to accept him.. he jus tinks tat by checkin on me keeping close tabs on me den things wld b ok.. but he din realise tat it also has an impact on my parents n i'm e one who has to deal wif dem.. of cos i noe i have no right to complain la.. aftall its cos of my wrong doings which led to tis.. i'm not sayin he cant keep tabs on me.. but at least try to do sm PR wif my parents so life won b so hard for me..

my mom jus came to give me a lecture.. hahaha.. how nice is tat.. sae i talk to andy y so rude.. lik quarrelling n y cant i b more humble.. its not tat i'm rude ar.. tis is e way we talk to each other.. we can even anihow scold vulgarities at each other in a joking manner.. n she commented tat we keep quarrelling how r we gonna get married? n tat tis way in future whn we're married how? tis is not e way i wan it to b also wad.. it takes two hands to clap.. e way both of us behave now is cos of how we started off.. how to change now? y cant dey jus leave me alone n let me handle my rls wif andy?? seriously v fan leh.. cannot take it manz.. haiz..

i jus want to be happy.. like every other couple out dere.. isit dat difficult? do i not deserve happiness?

10:17 pm

Y Thursday, September 20, 2007

i don need alot of ur time,
i don need alot of presents..
all i want is to feel love from u..
just a warm hug,
just a passionate kiss,
is enough to make my dae..

love cant exist with suspicion,
what is love,
when there is no trust..
so pls rid off all suspicion,
give me e benefit of the doubt,

only then can we truly be happy..

i want to feel like a princess,
i want to be your princess..
i want our rls to be filled with joy & happiness,
and be the envy of others..

10:21 pm

Y Tuesday, September 18, 2007

two items off my wishlist.. guess bag n nail extensions!! wahahaha..

guess bag is curtesy of my darling of cos.. bought for me during our 10th month anni! isnt my bao bei e SWEETEST?? hehehehe.. =) but sorta had some hiccups during our anni.. but everyting's well now.. dear's kena changed for e better la.. at least he did try to hong me n cheer me up aft tat.. heee.. dinner for anni was kinda budget la.. ate tis cheapo jap food at jec.. i had tis yummy noodle plus cheese plus duno wad.. n we ordered tis extra side dish-fried potato.. which was very unneccessary.. lol.. n we ended our celebration by playin arcade plus pool.. yup yup..

as for e nail extensions.. i did them myself!!! aint i clever?? lol.. though its not v smooth n nice.. but stil looks ok la.. better den none.. but e acrylic isnt v strong.. doesnt stick well on my nails.. fall off easily.. alr 2 has came off.. lol.. at least its better den my ugly real nails.. haha..

10:05 pm

Y Thursday, September 13, 2007

when u're talkin on e phone n e other party says he/she is sleepy and wants to sleep.. its not cos they're tired.. but its jus their excuse to hang up the phone.. last time i din noe.. each time andy said he wanted to hang up cos he's tired.. i tot he's reali tired.. but nw i noe its jus cos he is sick of talkin to me n wants to quickly hang up.. i guess its jus wu liao to talk to me ba.. jus talkin for e sake of talkin.. he doesnt even look forward to talk to me.. it reali saddens me to tink tat my bf is lidat.. haiz..

如果爱情已经失去了信任, 不值得了...

11:15 pm

Y Thursday, September 06, 2007

HEART: "Go back to Andy"
HEAD: "Don go back to Andy, he'l hurt u again"

so which do i listen to? my heart or my head? haha.. once again my heart ruled over my head n we're back tgt.. i duno if i should b happy or not.. we've broken up n patched back countless times.. seems reali stupid.. yet i stil love him alot n still went back to his side.. thinkin back on e dae we broke.. hw cruel he was to me whn he jus walked out on me, deleted ALL our pics frm fst n happily talked to gals.. n todae i act caught him talkin on e phone wif e gal i hate most.. haha.. how nice is tat.. haiz..

y cant i jus have a happy rls wif him? is it tat difficult? wad exactly did i do wrong? did i not do my job as a gf well enuf? tons of questions keep popping up in my head.. yet i don not hv e ans to most of them..

i'm glad i can stil continue to walk the journey with you by my side.. but smhow i still feel lonely.. esp whn u go to bed n i'm left all alone.. i noe i should b independent.. so i din complain whn u go to bed early..

i hope tis time the road would not b so bumpy.. n without cracks which seperates us.. i love u..

1:30 am

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